The sun follows me like a rain cloud, forever pouring down a blistering, mind-numbing heat. No longer content to disperse it’s rays, it focuses it’s omnipotent power directly on my soul; no physical body could shield it’s reach.
The wind screams so loud it penetrates my deafened ears. It hurls sand so hard it impales my flesh. If I loose my footing for but an instant, it wisps me away like a blade of grass in a hurricane.
Why am I still walking? Thirst, hunger, sanity. These are but distant memories. Pain, suffering, a hopeless illusion, all that remain. Was it a dream? An oasis? Did I really see paradise? Does happiness really exist?
Parents speak to their children of happiness, until the child becomes an adult; when the promise of happiness becomes mere content. Psychologists tell you that lasting happiness is a guise for lasting pain. Religions reward adherence to their laws with happiness after death. Societies redefine happiness to getting what you desire, then imposes various desires for you to get. Most will refer vaguely, to the notion, of the possibility of its its existence, but only a rare few set out to find it.
Are you determined to be happy?
Do you wish to be invulnerable? Or are you strong enough to be absolutely vulnerable? Do you passively mask your aggression? Or do you seek to destroy it? Are you content with ignorance? Or are you hopelessly addicted to understanding? Do you seek power? Or passion?
Are you willing to become a punching bag for the weak? To inhale only suffering? To exhale only love? To become an instrument of God?
I believe in affinity. I believe in the power of the mind. I believe if you want honestly, you have only to completely rid yourself of dishonesty, both to yourself and to others. If you desire happiness, you must vow to forever be happy. No guilt, no shame, no regret, no remorse. Nothing ugly. Everything beautiful. I think you may be surprised at how easy it really is.
The problem is that it takes extreme dedication to be happy. Those lacking resolve will make it their sole purpose to bring you down to their level; they don’t like to be reminded of their suffering. You will become the bright light awakening them from their hangover. They will try to turn you off; to break you if need be. They will try to rob you of your very essence. And you will have to let them.